That Flighty Temptress: Adventure

Woman v. The Government

• Woman: I cannot afford to have a child right now. Can I have birth control?
• Government: No.
• Woman: I got pregnant but I cannot afford to have a child and I'm not ready to be a parent. Can I have an abortion?
• Government: No.
• Woman: I had the child, but I cannot afford to raise him. Will you help me out?
• Government: No.
• Woman: I guess I'll have to give my child up for adoption.
• Barry and Steve: We would love to raise your child. We have been in a committed relationship for 15 years. We have steady careers and are very successful and financially stable. We love children and wish to provide a loving nurturing environment for your child. Would you be willing to give your child to us?
• Woman: Sure, as long as it's ok with the government.
• Government: No.

• Weather forecast: 64 degrees with sunshine.
• English Person: Quick let's get the BBQ, paddling pool and deck chairs out, let me go get my shorts and flip flops oh and don't forget the sun tan cream factor 50.
• WELSH PERSON: What is this strange, bright light? Oh my God, get inside children, get inside, it could be dangerous, have we got anything to protect ourselves, no, only raincoats, oh help, what's this odd feeling, I'm not cold, it must be what we've read about... warmth.
• SCOTTISH PERSON: WIT THE FUCK IS THAT
• Texas Person: Oh God. OH GOD. WHERE DID THE WARMTH GO? JESUS SAVE US ALL. HURRY TO CHURCH AND PRAY, CHILDREN, PRAY THAT THIS FROZEN LANDSCAPE SOON THAWS.
• Florida Person: It's such a nice day outside today. Maybe...whaT THE FUCK WHY IS IT SO DAMN COLD. TIME TO BREAK OUT THE JACKETS, SCARFS, UGGS, PANTS, AND MY HAT. JESUS CHRIST WHAT--FUCK IT'S RAINING.
• Tumblr Person: Nice day for blogging.
• California Person: Oh great, more fog.
• Spirit World: Haha.
• Australian Person: Fuck, mate, when did we get to Melbourne?